Sorry for the LONG delay. Obviously, it has been very busy in my life lately. This has been the most stressful, the most busy, and the most challenging part of my life. I know there is more to come, but right now, while I am sixteen years old, this has been my biggest hardship.
I'm now going to American Leadership Academy, a charter school near my home. Most of the time I have to walk, but luckily, now that it is winter, I get a ride to school. I've met friends, I've made love (and some drama), I've excelled in my talents, I've tried to make it fun, and I've gone through a lot.
You already know about my summer. Luckily I explained that in the last posts, but what happened after that? Well, life happened. Or in other words, High School did. I thought my conflict with the move and the mission and the wedding was enough, but as soon as I was in the house, me and my little sister set off to school two weeks later.
School started on a bad start. I made tons of friends, I kept smiling, but deep inside, I wasn't telling them what was going on in the other parts of my life. One of them was the College History class I was (and still am) taking. Tenth graders weren't really supposed to be in that class, but because I did so, I found out why. The beginning of the year was a panic. Every night I had to study on an entire chapter so the next day we could get a test on it. The chapters were not short, it took me several hours just to understand what was happening, for at my other school, I had not learned how to do good study skills. It took me the entire semester to figure it out. I had failed quizzes and tests, I had retaken them, I had cried and prayed my heart out to pass the tests, I had tried different techniques to study until I had enough to pass that class. Now that it is second semester, I am no longer in panic mode, even with my history teacher telling us that we will be having double study time this semester. I got it down enough that I can handle this stress.
The other conflict is more personal. I will not get too far into this because it is more of my personal life that I would rather keep details to myself. I've told you about Derek, the cute boy that I have been googly eyed over the last four years. For so long, I was upset that I had to move away from him, but now that I have been away for over five months, I've lost that relationship. For several weeks, he called me and texted me, we kept in touch twenty-four seven. But that connection was lost when my dear friend fell into a sin. A sin that would warp his perspective on not only me, but girls in general. That entire time I kept in touch, he was going through that sin. I didn't know that, I didn't even know until one day, his mother called me. She told me what he had been up to and that I shouldn't talk to him again, if not for a very long time.
I cried myself to sleep that night.
Four months ago, I was upset at him, upset at his actions. He didn't only hurt himself, but he hurt his friends, his family and me. Now I'm glad I am not over there to see him, because I don't want to. Four months ago, I was going to wait until he got better, but now I no longer love him. I found out I never did have true love with him, it was just infatuation. A very strong liking toward another, but not true love.
I'm just going to end here, I'm tearing up. I was going to tell you more about what is going on right now, but I'll say that in the next post. I can't continue right now.
I'm now going to American Leadership Academy, a charter school near my home. Most of the time I have to walk, but luckily, now that it is winter, I get a ride to school. I've met friends, I've made love (and some drama), I've excelled in my talents, I've tried to make it fun, and I've gone through a lot.
You already know about my summer. Luckily I explained that in the last posts, but what happened after that? Well, life happened. Or in other words, High School did. I thought my conflict with the move and the mission and the wedding was enough, but as soon as I was in the house, me and my little sister set off to school two weeks later.
School started on a bad start. I made tons of friends, I kept smiling, but deep inside, I wasn't telling them what was going on in the other parts of my life. One of them was the College History class I was (and still am) taking. Tenth graders weren't really supposed to be in that class, but because I did so, I found out why. The beginning of the year was a panic. Every night I had to study on an entire chapter so the next day we could get a test on it. The chapters were not short, it took me several hours just to understand what was happening, for at my other school, I had not learned how to do good study skills. It took me the entire semester to figure it out. I had failed quizzes and tests, I had retaken them, I had cried and prayed my heart out to pass the tests, I had tried different techniques to study until I had enough to pass that class. Now that it is second semester, I am no longer in panic mode, even with my history teacher telling us that we will be having double study time this semester. I got it down enough that I can handle this stress.
The other conflict is more personal. I will not get too far into this because it is more of my personal life that I would rather keep details to myself. I've told you about Derek, the cute boy that I have been googly eyed over the last four years. For so long, I was upset that I had to move away from him, but now that I have been away for over five months, I've lost that relationship. For several weeks, he called me and texted me, we kept in touch twenty-four seven. But that connection was lost when my dear friend fell into a sin. A sin that would warp his perspective on not only me, but girls in general. That entire time I kept in touch, he was going through that sin. I didn't know that, I didn't even know until one day, his mother called me. She told me what he had been up to and that I shouldn't talk to him again, if not for a very long time.
I cried myself to sleep that night.
Four months ago, I was upset at him, upset at his actions. He didn't only hurt himself, but he hurt his friends, his family and me. Now I'm glad I am not over there to see him, because I don't want to. Four months ago, I was going to wait until he got better, but now I no longer love him. I found out I never did have true love with him, it was just infatuation. A very strong liking toward another, but not true love.
I'm just going to end here, I'm tearing up. I was going to tell you more about what is going on right now, but I'll say that in the next post. I can't continue right now.